Sunday, December 26, 2010

It's in!!!

Before my Power Line
After 

It's done! I am happy to report that I now have my very own "Power Line" AND it's purple. As I write this I'm currently on the flight back home to Austin and I can't help but smile because the fight has begun.  It's on Lyme bugs and I'm ready to fight.  The procedure itself was not too bad. There was a little mix up with scheduling but at 9 am I was taken back to the room and the Doctor explained to me what he was going to do.  I then smiled and said, " I know I watched it on YouTube and if you want I can show you how to do it if you give me some piano wire and a mirror." He loved that! They ended up going in through the jugular and the tube comes out from my chest. I of course was being my silly self and I think it helped set the mood for the room.  The catherization nurse was awesome and put Christmas music on for me.  The tech who assisted the Dr. was a Saints fan and I gave him crap because they lost Sunday.  They started prepping me and I panicked for like 2 seconds then I remembered I was not alone and I had the prayers of many guiding the hand of the Dr. At that point I was given the Medicine that was supposed to put me to sleep but instead it made my brain get jumbled up and I swore I saw my thoughts turn into a kaleidoscope and just like that I was back, I heard the zip, zip, zip of the line going into my jugular, a little pressure and vuala the Dr. was done.  I thanked everyone for being so nice and I was wheeled away to recover, but I refused to go to sleep.  I didn't like the medication they gave me to knock me out because it made me feel like I lost control for a little bit and I don't like that very much.

My life is on hold for the next 6 months.  It goes like this, 3 weeks of antibiotics and fluids  then 1 week off. On my off week I fly to DC and get a new antibiotic added to my treatment.  I've started my treatments at a local infusion center here in Austin. MWF I go twice a day for my dose of antibiotics. TThSaSu I go once a day for fluids that help with detoxing  and provide me with electrolytes (I think). So far so good, I feel a little loopy on some days and I'm sleeping now more than ever.  I hope my body gets used to this soon since I go back to work in a week.

The thing is I don't feel so helpless anymore.  I feel like I've got hope for the first time in my life.  I don't like operating on half a brain and I look forward to getting my brain back.  That's what I miss the most...my brain.  The funny thing is ever since the procedure for the Power Line I believe in my heart I will get better.  It's like a higher power was with me at that time and told me so only I didn't hear a thing but my heart and soul know it.  I'm glad I feel that way because I was loosing my way...

FYI: I started this post on my flight back the 22 and just finished it on the 26.  What can I say, I have Lyme brain :)

Thursday, December 9, 2010

FML

I woke up this morning freaking out. I had forgotten about a meeting I was supposed to attend the day before at my other job.  Completely forgot, this meeting didn't even cross my mind once at any point in the day yesterday. I was so mad at myself today. HOW could I forget? I never forget when i need to be in a meeting where other people are expecting me!!  I've been at this job for two months and I fucking forgot! Agghhh it just eats away at me that my memory is shot.  I event wrote it down on my calendar. FYI: I have this meeting every Wed. same time, same place, same people.  I don't want to hear about how it happens to everyone, because I am not every one I am me and I DON'T forget meetings. 

On another note, I've been sleeping 2 hrs everyday after work. Some days I'm more tired than others but I always sleep when I get home.  You would think all this sleeping during the day would keep me up untill all hours of the night, but my mind keeps me up not my sleep.  I can't stop thinking about my life and what I am about to go through.  Some nights I want to scream, sometimes I want to cry, but I don't because I am not allowed to ask why (It's against the rules).  I will be honest though...I'm scared. 

Sunday, December 5, 2010

15 more days

 My Lyme journey started January 2010. That's when I got "THE" Lyme test that came back positive.  It took me three months to get the courage to seek out a Lyme Dr. to help me treat the disease.  4 months for him to retire and another 4 months to find a Dr in another state that I thought would give me the best chance at beating this thing.  So here I am 11 months later about to begin the biggest fight of my life...

In 15 days I will be getting a power line put in. What is a power line? Hell if I know, but I do know it goes in your chest and if I could I would make one my self using piano wire and some leftover tubes from my motorcycle gas lines. Would it be safe, NO but it would be cheep! Here is a link to a video of how one is put it. 

 http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m7ppMf3JnoE

I decided to start this blog because I have been looking for a way to chronicle my journey as I begin my IV antibiotic treatments.